Wednesday 23 July 2014

Letter to the School Board, dated July 20th

Here follows the letter that I sent to the local school district office regarding the absence of their voice publicly on this issue:

Dear Sir or Madam,

I write today as a parent of two school-age children attending schools in
School District X (number redacted for privacy), with another poised to begin Kindergarten in September.

I have very closely followed the path of the ongoing labour dispute between
BCPSEA and the BCTF; I have read press releases from both parties; blog
entries by invested individuals, parents, students, and teachers; news
reports from a wide array of news sources. My children and I have stood on
the picket lines with teachers, and I have personally spoken to many friends
who work in this district as teachers and support staff. I have also read
open letters sent to the Premier and Minister Fassbender from several school
districts, including the one sent by Trustee #1 (names redacted) and Trustee #2 from this
district dated June 30 of this year.

I find it both curious and frustrating that this school district and this
Board of Education has been silent on the issue of class size and
composition, and the court rulings by Justice Susan Griffin.

Some vague mention was made of the impact this dispute has had on students,
staff and families in (our town, name redacted for privacy), but it is very distressing that this
district has utterly failed to address the BC Liberals' unwillingness to
comply with Supreme Court decisions instructing the government to restore
working conditions to pre-2002 standards, and to properly fund public
education to make provisions for optimum learning conditions for all
students.

Can you please explain to me how it is that while you are responsible for the
allocation of funding to the public schools in (our town), you have said
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about this matter publicly? Your silence implies that you
have absolved yourselves of your duty of care to the children of your
district, to fight to secure sufficient funding to properly educate our
children to the standard that they have the right to receive. In so doing,
you have blithely laid the burden of negotiating work conditions at the feet
of the teachers' union.

Shame on you for your silence; it is deplorable that the BCTF not only has to
negotiate for wages and benefits, as is right to do, but also has to
undertake negotiations for their working conditions. No other union in BC is
forced to negotiate for working conditions; that is YOUR job to advocate for
teachers and support staff.

I am the parent of two gifted children; they are unique in that the system is
not failing them as much as their peers - YET. I am able to augment their
education experience at home, and they are self-motivated enough to initiate
activities that help to fulfill their IEP objectives. But I should not have
to do that; they should not have to do that. Their teachers know that my
children, intelligent as they are, are still falling between the cracks; they
see it and they talk with me about it, but we both know that they are
helpless to do anything but perform triage in their classrooms with the
limited resources made available to them. BC teachers are stretched too thin,
dealing with too many category children with nowhere near enough support.

As a parent, a tax-payer and a product of a BC public school education, I
charge you to step up to the forefront of this fight for our children. Take a
public stand on teachers' working conditions; publicly castigate the
government for their flagrant disregard for the rule of law; do your job and
advocate for the funding required to return class size and composition to
their previous state, so that we can move forward instead of sitting idly by
while the BC Liberals systematically dismantle public education to serve
their two-tiered agenda.

Step up and do the right thing.

Sincerely,

Busy Little Bee (name redacted), parent

Saturday 19 July 2014

10 Day Writing Challenge - Day 7

Day Seven: Four turn offs

1) Disrespect. A lack of respect for yourself or others is an immense turn-off for me. This manifests as poor self-image/running yourself down, making jokes at other people's expense, etc.

2) Bad breath. This is mostly in combination with a lack of oral care (brushing of one's teeth, regular dental care). I am hyper-vigilant about my own, so as not to offend others.

3) Arrogance. I understand about having a good sense of one's own worth; it's when that becomes overblown that it makes someone less attractive to me.


4) Poor health. If you're not taking care of yourself, you are showing me that you don't make yourself a priority in life, that you don't matter. You do matter - make yourself a priority.

Stay tuned for Challenge Day Eight: Three turn ons

Wednesday 16 July 2014

10 Day Writing Challenge: Day 6

Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
 

1) Mum. You gave me enough freedom to make my own mistakes, but were always there to comfort me, encourage me and lift me up again. You taught me that I matter. You were strict, but I am so grateful for that.

2) Mom. You're just what I needed in my life. I am so glad to have the relationship that we do, because I treasure it. When things with my own mother were strained, it was a great comfort to me to know that you were just a phone call away. Your help without judgement is appreciated more than you know.

3) Hubby. There is no way that I can adequately express here how very much you need to me. For me, you are God's grace personified; you found me at my lowest, and have helped me to soar higher than I thought possible. Thank you for leading me when I need it, following when I ask it, and being at my side for everything that is to come.

4) BioDad (BD). Thank you for giving me Primus and Secunda. Although I messed things up horribly, you were merciful and forgiving, and I feel that we have moved beyond it to a better place where I can say with absolute conviction that I'm glad that we shared a part of our lives together, and I'm glad that Primus and Secunda have a growing relationship with you.

5) Me. I struggled with who to put here. And even as recently as a year ago,  I wouldn't have put me on this list. But a lot of introspection has happened for me since then, and I have come to realise that in order for anyone else to see my value, I have to first see it in myself. So thank you for having the strength to endure an abusive teacher, to withstand the years of bullying, to not let rape define me; thank you for getting up each time I got knocked down, for opening up to others even when it was scary, for learning to stand up to others, for responding with kindness rather than in kind, for walking away from what wasn't healthy or nurturing, and for your faith that there was a better, more profound life waiting for me.



Stay tuned for Day Seven: Four turn offs.

Sunday 13 July 2014

Reflections on a Marriage

A day late, but that's because we were busy :)

My beloved and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary yesterday, and our 7th anniversary together. I sit here, trying to encapsulate my feelings into some pithy remark about the day, and find that words utterly fail me. This incredible man that has chosen to spend his life with me, to raise a family with me, to love, honour and cherish me, to challenge me, to lift me up and to bring me back down to earth when I need it - how can I distill all of what he means to me into a sentence or two? Well, the easy answer is that I can't.

I met Hubby when I was just coming out of the lowest point in my adult life. A failed marriage under my belt, followed by a failed relationship with someone who was very much wrong for me. I had two small kids, had just left a crap job and just started another one. I lived with my parents. I felt disconnected from most of my friends, disconnected from my family, and disconnected from God.

And literally, in the space of one day, I went from resigning myself to life without love or passion, to getting everything I ever dreamed of.

My life since that day has not always been smooth; we've still had our share of bumps in the road. but it has been made easier to bear knowing that I will not be on this path alone. Because of Hubby, I have renewed faith. Because of him I have a loving father that is present both physically and emotionally for our children. Because of him, I have passion in my life. Because of him, I am able to be at home with our youngest two, preparing them for life. Because of him, I feel loved every day.

Thank you, my love, for everything.
Christmas decorating with Hubby and the hobbitses

Sunday 6 July 2014

10 Day Writing Challenge: Day 5

Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done

1) I wish I had never accepted that offer. My life would have still followed the same trajectory, but it would have been a more honourable path.

2) I wish I hadn't left university when I did. I'd have a graduate degree by now if I had stayed.

3) I wish I'd never believed him when he invited me over.

4) I wish I'd gone out to my car instead of staying.

5) That pretty much sums up my regrets. And if I can only come up with four things I wish I'd never done, that's pretty good in my book.

Stay tuned for Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)

Friday 4 July 2014

10 Day Writing Challenge - Day 4

Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot

1) How do I juggle the bills without getting some utility cut off?

2) Whether we are ever going to crawl out from under this student loan/consumer debt

3) How can I help Primus navigate adolescence without feeling like I'm smothering him or cramping his style?

4) Will Quarta EVER stop screeching when she's mad?

5) How do I lift up Secunda on these many, many days that she seems to feel down?

6) How do I best show Hubby how much I love and support him?

7) Am I doing okay as a wife and parent, or am I screwing them all up irreparably?








Stay tuned for the next Challenge post -  Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.

Thursday 3 July 2014

10 Day Writing Challenge - Day 3

Day Three: 8 Ways to Win My Heart

1) Give me flowers for no reason

2) Foot rubs :)


3) Be romantic

4) Hugs

5) Let me eat chocolate when I need to without judging.

6) Wash the hand dishes so I don't have to.

7) Plan a whole evening together for us

8) Neck/shoulder rubs

Wednesday 2 July 2014

10 Day Writing Challenge: Day 2

Day 2: Nine Things About Yourself

1) I am left-handed, but consider myself mostly ambidextrous. I pretty much only use my left hand for using a fork and general writing.

2) I'm smarter than most people think I am.

3) I feel enormous self-doubt most days.

4) I worry every month when I go off the Pill for the week that I might be pregnant.

5) Eight years ago, doctors removed a softball-sized lump of hardened fat (panniculitis) from my right butt cheek, but my butt never got any less fat. I feel a little cheated about that. Frankenbutt, indeed.

6) People in the SCA seem to think that I can do calligraphy, and ask me to do on-site scribal duties. I can't do that. I've taught myself how to copy exemplars, and do so competently but laboriously at home when I have enough time. But I'm a left-handed scribe who has learned how to do calligraphy right-handed, and I just don't do enough of it to be any good at it.

7) There are days that I could drop being in the SCA entirely and not miss it. But I know how unhappy that would make Hubby, so I don't. Money has been tight, a lot, of late, and I know that not eventing would save us a decent amount of money. But I also have to balance the benefits of seeing my friends and engaging in something that interests me with  cost savings. Be frugal, yes. But also have a life.

8) I've finally learned how to take a compliment from my husband.

9) Writing this post took me two weeks, because I didn't think there would be 9 things interesting enough to share here.

Picture Day?

So, Hubby and I are relaxing in the living room, watching Lost on Netflix and trying not to melt after a long and enjoyable Canada Day celebration.  Tertius and Quarta have been having trouble settling down to sleep lately, and Tertius came upstairs from his sleepover with Primus to stick his patriotically painted fingernails in my face and declare,

"Can you get the nail polish remover? Because this *brandishing nails at me* will not look good for picture day."

Having not quite heard him, I asked him to repeat himself, which he did. Then it clicked for us; he was thinking about school! I assured him that tomorrow was not picture day, promised that I would remove the polish in the morning, and sent him back to bed. In talking about it, Hubby and I surmise that he was having a dream about school, woke up, and came directly upstairs to talk to us about it.

Cute kid I got there...

Decluttering My Way

 I have a confession to make.     I hate housework. Yes, me - the proprietor of Busy Bee Domestic Wizardry, where I cleaned other peoples...