Decluttering My Way

 I have a confession to make.

    I hate housework. Yes, me - the proprietor of Busy Bee Domestic Wizardry, where I cleaned other peoples' houses for six years. It's true. Oh, I know how to clean, I just don't like to do it. And I live with someone who has self-admitted mild packrat tendencies; which is not to say that I'm any better. My craft room looks like Michael's barfed all over my space. And we have kids who, to one degree or another, have difficulty parting with belongings because they attach so must sentimental value to the objects, feel overwhelmed when facing cleaning due to executive dysfunction, get anxious, or like me, have a serious case of LazyVision­. When we put an object down, if it stays there long enough, we just stop seeing it altogether.

    Over the last few months, the topic of decluttering has come up on my social media feed a lot. I've developed a method that borrows from a few sources that I have found inspirational in my own  (ongoing) decluttering journey, and also takes my undiagnosed ADHD and associated executive dysfunction into account. I've spent the past few years refining it, and I'm pretty happy with how it looks now. Is my family perfect? Certainly not. Friends have told me that it sounds like a good method, so I decided to share it here, and I hope that it - or at least parts of it - are useful for you. Please feel free to keep what is useful, and ignore what doesn't work for you or your situation

    So here are the principles:

    1. Preparation Is Key

    In order to have a really successful decluttering session, you need to be ready for it. This was a trick that I gleaned from The Flylady. She sells cute purple bins that are for the "Keep/Toss/Give Away" process, but you really don't have to spend anything beyond your regular household budget. Another important thing I learned was not to do it when I'm tired, or hungry, or stressed. That having been said, there are going to be times that you can't avoid this, and that's okay. But be aware of your personal condition going into it, and make the necessary allowances for it. Remember: it is always right to be kind to yourself.

    With that in mind, this method works whether you have five minutes, or a whole day. You will need the following: a garbage bag, a recycling bag or box, a bag or box for donated items, a refreshing drink with a spill-proof container, and a list if you find that sort of thing helpful. My particular flavour of ADHD means that I live my life by a series of lists, as that is what keeps me on track and avoid devolving into a chaotic mess of "startitis". Now you're ready to dig in.

    2. Start With The Easy Decisions

    If you're decluttering, your space has clearly become more than you can easily or comfortably cope with. Don't beat yourself up about it; it happens to all of us sometimes. Again, go back to my Golden Rule of Decluttering - Be kind to yourself. If you are planning to go through things that have great personal significance or sentimental value for you, or that you anticipate will be difficult to face, such as going through a deceased loved ones' belongings, you may want to ask a family member or a friend to help with the process; someone who isn't emotionally invested in your stuff can help you see things more clearly, and be able to make decisions quickly and with conviction.

    So, what are the "easy decisions", anyway? I break these down into five smaller jobs: garbage/recycling, stuff that doesn't belong in here, dirty laundry, clean laundry, and books. If you haven't guessed by now, my family has a lot of these things in the spaces that need decluttering!

        A. Garbage: This one is really easy. Just toss anything that is obviously garbage. Snap open that garbage bag, and toss that crap!

        B. Stuff That Doesn't Belong In Here: This is the only time I disregard my "Only touch an item once" rule. Set it aside *OUTSIDE OF THE ROOM YOU'RE WORKING IN* and put them all away in their proper home when your decluttering session is nearing its end.

        C. Dirty Laundry: Gather it up, and put it in the place closest to getting them washed, dried, folded, and put away. For our house, that's in the large bins in the laundry room. Do what works best for you.

        D. Clean Laundry: You have no idea how many times I've walked into a kids' bedroom to find the laundry I've lovingly washed, dried, and folded sitting in increasingly untidy stacks on top of dressers, beds, desks, or on the floor. If I had a nickel for every time, I'd probably be able to retire. Just put it away. 

        E. Books: Put them where they belong in the room, be that a bookshelf, or a tidy stack on the bedside table, or the donate bin. Our kids all have a bookshelf in their rooms; oddly, Hubby and I don't have one in *our* bedroom, and we're both bibliophiles, so I have a feeling that this will be changing as I go through the process of decluttering the master bedroom this summer.

    Once these five things are done, I promise, you will be struck by how much better your room looks already. What may have seemed a truly insurmountable task now feels achievable - and it is.

    3. Touch Each Item Only Once

    I'm a big fan of not doing more work than is necessary, and this principle really feeds into that. When your easy decisions are done, it's time to settle in for the "Keep/Toss/Give Away" portion. When you do this, you should be able to make a pretty definitive decision about your belongings within five seconds. Once the decision has been made, either put it in the garbage, the donate container, or, and this is a key thing I learned from Dana, aka A Slob Comes Clean, go put it in its home *right now*. This all but ensures that you only have to touch each item once. This is also the stage where Flylady's two questions come into play ("Do I love it? Do I use it?" If you can say yes to one of these, by all means, keep the item), as well as Dana's decluttering questions ("If I was looking for this, where is the first place I'd look? GO PUT IT THERE NOW", and "If I needed this, would I know that I already had one? No? Put it in the donate bin. Yes? PUT IT THERE NOW."). Likewise, Marie Kondo suggests that you ask if the item sparks joy for you, and if it doesn't, you thank it for serving its purpose in your life and let it go.

    4. Progress, Not Perfection

    This principle was probably the hardest for me to embrace. I am, by nature, a perfectionist. So having to leave a project unfinished used to give me a great deal of guilt. But with the idea that you're seeking progress, and not perfection, even five minutes of decluttering is still progress. And try not to get hung up on things if you have someone helping you that does things differently, or forgets a step, or makes a mistake. If it's not done to the standards you expect from yourself, that's okay. As FlyLady is fond of saying, "Housework done incorrectly still blesses your family."

    5. Wrap It Up

    However long you've been working, the time has come to wrap it up. The whole idea behind this method is that you never leave a room in a state of chaos - at least, no more so than you found it in! Put the garbage and recycling bags outside,  the donate container in your vehicle for the next drop-off day, and your things that don't belong in that room it their proper places. By putting things away as you go, you are always making progress, and you're never putting yourself further behind.

    So there it is. If you find any of this useful, or have any questions, throw me a comment!