Monday 30 May 2016

My Journey of Hope: Getting Buy-In

This weekend has been all about buy-in for me.

First up, my parents. They are both dealing with myriad health issues, and the biggest thing they're facing right now is my father's newly discovered kidney disease. It is causing a great deal of fatigue for him, to the point that walking from the living room to the bathroom makes him winded. And forget about stairs! So, adjustments have been made in the house to accommodate their current needs, but their food storage was still an issue, as was making healthy meals. They have been relying more heavily on canned and packaged foods of late, which isn't as good as whole foods, but with limited ability to access the freezer in the basement, that complicated things.

My brother, sis-in-law and nephew were visiting this weekend, so we took the opportunity to bring a luncheon feast to them all. We even invited BioDad's father over, because after all, he's family. I made a rather spectacular creamy baked potato soup, and we had salads, chips and deli buns to enjoy. Mumsy went out to the store and picked up dessert, too!

While there, Bro, Hubby, and I had a chance to talk about some solutions for the food issue, and we presented the following idea: they have two ancient freezers (no really; one is something like 50 years old) in the basement, both full to the brim with food of unknown age and condition. Bro and I have volunteered to go through both of them, tossing anything outdated or freezer-burnt, and condensing what's left. We then suggested that they look at buying a new upright freezer that lives on the main floor, and we would batch-cook things like spaghetti sauce, chili, meat loaf, lasagna, etc. and freeze them in two portions. Then all they have to do is get a freezer bag or foil loaf pan out the night before, and cook up the side dishes while it cooks.

Thankfully, both of our parents were really on board with the idea! Of course, the moment I mentioned putting the old freezers out to pasture, he got this slightly panicked look on his face - we can't get rid of something useful, right? Baby steps - we'll start with de-cluttering the freezers, and see where it leads, but he did admit that neither appliance is very energy-conscious and would likely lower their power bill to have them shut off. It's so heartening to see progress being made.

Sunday saw me without a vehicle, so I was unable to attend church, though Primus got a ride from Hubby before he left for the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism) event going on this weekend. (Side story: when Primus arrived at church, the man leading the worship team was disappointed that P was not on the platform, guitar in hand. He had jammed with them at the Thursday practice and got great response, and I think they all kind of expected that he would be playing. He had to let them know that he was in charge of media today, but nonetheless, they gave him copies of the music, complete with guitar chords, that he can now practice at home. What a great boost to his self-esteem! I'm so stinkin' proud of that kid.)

Because we were stuck at home, I decided to declare it Pajama Day, and Tertius, Quarta and I stayed in our jammie-jams all day long - you should have seen the confusion when Hubby and I told them to get their jammies on for bed tonight! We watched Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban, followed by a show that Secunda requested, "Attacking the Devil: Harold Evans and the Last Nazi War Crime", a documentary on Thalidomide babies, and the newspaper campaign of truth that blew the story open in the 1970s. Fascinating show. The little guys had some questions, so we talked about the birth defects, the improper testing, and the shoddy compensation offered to families. It also gave me the opportunity to talk to them about how such birth defects rarely affect cognitive ability, how these men and women overcame the limitations this medication placed upon them, and how they are able to function quite well in the world.

When we took a break for them to practice their breakdance routine that they're doing for the talent show at school, I went downstairs to the office, which had begun to get cluttered again. I spent a few minutes assessing what I can do (starting with putting a few items up on the 24 hour bidding site), and by the time Tertius and Quarta came inside, I had a bag at the ready. We quickly picked up about 20 pieces of garbage, and made it look much nicer in there! I had no whining, no cajoling, and no resistance to the task as presented to them. It put such a smile on my face!

So, not a lot of work got done around here because of my painful hands, but dishes got completely caught up again, progress was made in the office, and a big step has started for my parents' home.

Talk about a weekend of win!

Thursday 19 May 2016

My Journey of Hope: The De-Cluttering Continues!

I was at the dollar store with Secunda today, picking up flower pots for a fairy garden workshop we were doing later in the evening. While there, I had the lovely idea of finding a method of better organizing the bathroom drawer that Tertius and Quarta share. Up until now, the only measure I'd taken to tame the chaos in the drawer was to put a narrow plastic tray in there to contain the toothbrushes and toothpaste, which had become woefully inadequate. It seemed that the toothbrushes were breeding (another area that my children hoard items), the most recent trip to the dentist had yielded two new mini-tubes of paste, and the whole drawer was well past due for an overhaul.

Wednesday 18 May 2016

My Journey of Hope: Day 28 of 28 - Creating (and keeping!) An Oasis Of Calm, Part Two

Okay, you've been very patient with me, so here are the photos of the front deck at this stage of completeness. I just need to update my chair, the table, and the carpet, and perhaps add some lighting. Then it will be perfect for us!


My own little flower planter! Pansies and verbena

Secunda's birthday cineraria (round pot), and Secunda's' planter full of pansies, heliotrope and verbena

My tea roses from the hobbitses' school (round pot), and Tertius' planter of pansies, heliotrope and nemesia

Our wee strawberry patch!

Enjoying breakfast on a sunny day! Our herbs are planted in the green pots hanging from the railing: lemon balm, winter savoury, cilantro, basil and oregano


Monday 16 May 2016

My Journey of Hope: Day 28 of 28 - Creating (and keeping!) An Oasis Of Calm, Part One

To cap off my journey, I decided that I needed a reward for the work I'd done. And for me, that meant getting my front deck set up the way I want it.

Of course, some aspects of that will have to wait until payday, such as a new Adirondack chair, and a new carpet. But there was still plenty to do!

Thursday 12 May 2016

My Journey of Hope: Decluttering - It's the Little Things That Count

After dropping Hubby and the hobbitses off at their respective schools, I came home to make breakfast, grab an iced coffee, and head out to run errands. And while in the kitchen, I decided to take of my Lazy Vision™ goggles, and really look at my kitchen.

And when I looked at the point of entry, this is what I saw:


Tuesday 3 May 2016

My Journey of Hope: Day 28 of 28 - Reflections

Well, here we are at the end of the 28 day journey, and while, admittedly, my surgery really derailed things at the end, I am still very pleased with the progress that has been made in my home, and how clean and de-cluttered the areas I've worked on are staying. This house is FAR from done, but I feel that my efforts were worth it, and it's worth it to keep at it, a little bit at a time.

I also think it's worth the time to address what worked, what didn't work, and what I'd like to try with my next phase of this.

What Worked:

1. Looking around and finding something that bugged me enough to change it was the single most motivating factor on this whole thing.

2. Getting buy-in from family members ahead of time. The big, shameful mess in front of our living room bookshelves had a lot of things that didn't belong to me, so I knew that I had to have Hubby on board with addressing his share of it beforehand, and he agreed to deal with his things. Now, his stuff still isn't put away into their proper places, but that's mostly because we just don't have those places yet. Yes, they now reside in the previously cleared part of the office, but they were not shoved back in behind the chairs, and that is progress. I am calling this a win.

3. Pre-writing portions of blog posts. Life gets very hectic very easily, and I found that the best way to stay on top of the blogging was to pre-select topics to write on, put a blurb in, and save them as drafts. The point-form notes reminded me of what I wanted to say, and I was better able to more faithfully blog about the process that way. I allowed life to carry me away, and I was not nearly as good about blogging my progress, so there are things that got done that will not be blogged about, but the important thing is, I can see that they got done, and my home looks better for it.

4. Awareness and mindfulness of our stuff, where it is, and where we leave it has increased dramatically. Both Hubby and I are being more intentional about our belongings and where they live.

What Didn't Work:

1. Getting anything done in Tertius and Quarta's room. I knew that was my biggest obstacle going into this, but I still had hope that they would come on board. And Tertius was pretty enthusiastic at the start. But when he realized that some actual work had to get done, his enthusiasm fizzled out very quickly. They would be asked to pick up in their room, but within minutes, they could be found either re-creating the mess they had just cleaned, or making an even bigger one. I think that this room is a week-long task unto itself, and one that I will have to undertake while they're at school.

2. Pre-selecting areas to work on. It's lovely to make a neat, tidy little list of places that need de-cluttering, but it's another thing entirely to actually work that list.

What I'd Do Differently:

1. More buy-in from family members. I think in order to not be fighting upstream, I need my family to not only buy into me de-cluttering, but I need them to opt in as well.

2. Work for a set time, and make that in the mornings. I'm finding that I am more effective if I just jump right into a task after dropping everyone off at school.

For those of you who jumped onto this crazy train with me, what are your reflections?

Decluttering My Way

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