Decluttering My Way

 I have a confession to make.

    I hate housework. Yes, me - the proprietor of Busy Bee Domestic Wizardry, where I cleaned other peoples' houses for six years. It's true. Oh, I know how to clean, I just don't like to do it. And I live with someone who has self-admitted mild packrat tendencies; which is not to say that I'm any better. My craft room looks like Michael's barfed all over my space. And we have kids who, to one degree or another, have difficulty parting with belongings because they attach so must sentimental value to the objects, feel overwhelmed when facing cleaning due to executive dysfunction, get anxious, or like me, have a serious case of LazyVision­. When we put an object down, if it stays there long enough, we just stop seeing it altogether.

    Over the last few months, the topic of decluttering has come up on my social media feed a lot. I've developed a method that borrows from a few sources that I have found inspirational in my own  (ongoing) decluttering journey, and also takes my undiagnosed ADHD and associated executive dysfunction into account. I've spent the past few years refining it, and I'm pretty happy with how it looks now. Is my family perfect? Certainly not. Friends have told me that it sounds like a good method, so I decided to share it here, and I hope that it - or at least parts of it - are useful for you. Please feel free to keep what is useful, and ignore what doesn't work for you or your situation

    So here are the principles:

    1. Preparation Is Key

    In order to have a really successful decluttering session, you need to be ready for it. This was a trick that I gleaned from The Flylady. She sells cute purple bins that are for the "Keep/Toss/Give Away" process, but you really don't have to spend anything beyond your regular household budget. Another important thing I learned was not to do it when I'm tired, or hungry, or stressed. That having been said, there are going to be times that you can't avoid this, and that's okay. But be aware of your personal condition going into it, and make the necessary allowances for it. Remember: it is always right to be kind to yourself.

    With that in mind, this method works whether you have five minutes, or a whole day. You will need the following: a garbage bag, a recycling bag or box, a bag or box for donated items, a refreshing drink with a spill-proof container, and a list if you find that sort of thing helpful. My particular flavour of ADHD means that I live my life by a series of lists, as that is what keeps me on track and avoid devolving into a chaotic mess of "startitis". Now you're ready to dig in.

    2. Start With The Easy Decisions

    If you're decluttering, your space has clearly become more than you can easily or comfortably cope with. Don't beat yourself up about it; it happens to all of us sometimes. Again, go back to my Golden Rule of Decluttering - Be kind to yourself. If you are planning to go through things that have great personal significance or sentimental value for you, or that you anticipate will be difficult to face, such as going through a deceased loved ones' belongings, you may want to ask a family member or a friend to help with the process; someone who isn't emotionally invested in your stuff can help you see things more clearly, and be able to make decisions quickly and with conviction.

    So, what are the "easy decisions", anyway? I break these down into five smaller jobs: garbage/recycling, stuff that doesn't belong in here, dirty laundry, clean laundry, and books. If you haven't guessed by now, my family has a lot of these things in the spaces that need decluttering!

        A. Garbage: This one is really easy. Just toss anything that is obviously garbage. Snap open that garbage bag, and toss that crap!

        B. Stuff That Doesn't Belong In Here: This is the only time I disregard my "Only touch an item once" rule. Set it aside *OUTSIDE OF THE ROOM YOU'RE WORKING IN* and put them all away in their proper home when your decluttering session is nearing its end.

        C. Dirty Laundry: Gather it up, and put it in the place closest to getting them washed, dried, folded, and put away. For our house, that's in the large bins in the laundry room. Do what works best for you.

        D. Clean Laundry: You have no idea how many times I've walked into a kids' bedroom to find the laundry I've lovingly washed, dried, and folded sitting in increasingly untidy stacks on top of dressers, beds, desks, or on the floor. If I had a nickel for every time, I'd probably be able to retire. Just put it away. 

        E. Books: Put them where they belong in the room, be that a bookshelf, or a tidy stack on the bedside table, or the donate bin. Our kids all have a bookshelf in their rooms; oddly, Hubby and I don't have one in *our* bedroom, and we're both bibliophiles, so I have a feeling that this will be changing as I go through the process of decluttering the master bedroom this summer.

    Once these five things are done, I promise, you will be struck by how much better your room looks already. What may have seemed a truly insurmountable task now feels achievable - and it is.

    3. Touch Each Item Only Once

    I'm a big fan of not doing more work than is necessary, and this principle really feeds into that. When your easy decisions are done, it's time to settle in for the "Keep/Toss/Give Away" portion. When you do this, you should be able to make a pretty definitive decision about your belongings within five seconds. Once the decision has been made, either put it in the garbage, the donate container, or, and this is a key thing I learned from Dana, aka A Slob Comes Clean, go put it in its home *right now*. This all but ensures that you only have to touch each item once. This is also the stage where Flylady's two questions come into play ("Do I love it? Do I use it?" If you can say yes to one of these, by all means, keep the item), as well as Dana's decluttering questions ("If I was looking for this, where is the first place I'd look? GO PUT IT THERE NOW", and "If I needed this, would I know that I already had one? No? Put it in the donate bin. Yes? PUT IT THERE NOW."). Likewise, Marie Kondo suggests that you ask if the item sparks joy for you, and if it doesn't, you thank it for serving its purpose in your life and let it go.

    4. Progress, Not Perfection

    This principle was probably the hardest for me to embrace. I am, by nature, a perfectionist. So having to leave a project unfinished used to give me a great deal of guilt. But with the idea that you're seeking progress, and not perfection, even five minutes of decluttering is still progress. And try not to get hung up on things if you have someone helping you that does things differently, or forgets a step, or makes a mistake. If it's not done to the standards you expect from yourself, that's okay. As FlyLady is fond of saying, "Housework done incorrectly still blesses your family."

    5. Wrap It Up

    However long you've been working, the time has come to wrap it up. The whole idea behind this method is that you never leave a room in a state of chaos - at least, no more so than you found it in! Put the garbage and recycling bags outside,  the donate container in your vehicle for the next drop-off day, and your things that don't belong in that room it their proper places. By putting things away as you go, you are always making progress, and you're never putting yourself further behind.

    So there it is. If you find any of this useful, or have any questions, throw me a comment!

Tea Time!

I love tea. And, it seems, I love collecting tea. We have well over two dozen different types of tea in our cupboard, and overflowing onto the counter and the shelves near the kettle. I am so much a creature of habit that I make the same kind of tea almost every day. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely ADORE my Dilmah - a single origin Ceylon tea with no tannic acid, meaning I can enjoy it any time of day without suffering from heartburn. Hubby's favourite tea is Earl Grey, and we also enjoy that regularly, as well as the cheap but very tasty Chai from Trader Joe's, but I keep going back to my Dilmah.

I have very thoughtful friends and family who have gifted us with interesting teas, herbal infusions, rooibos, green, matcha, and the like. But I drink three kinds of tea most of the time, leaving all of these other delightful varieties languishing on the shelf.

So I decided a few days ago that I was going to try a new tea every day or two. Here are my tea adventures so far...

Day One (December 30):

 Tea: Let It Snow
Source: David's Tea, from their tea advent calendar; sample given to me by the stellar J.
Type: Green, with cinnamon, clove, and custard
Remarks: This was a lovely, light tea, and it's one I would gladly drink again. Perfect for a stand-alone cup, or with cookies; I'd suggest sugar cookies or anything with an uncomplicated flavour profile.

Day Two (December 31):

Tea: Cardamom French Toast
Source: David's Tea, bought on sale
Type: Black, with cardamom, cane sugar, and cinnamon
Remarks: This was a truly delightful experience, and I would absolutely buy this tea again. I liken it to a dessert tea, and would enjoy a cup of it after a meal.

Day Three (January 1):

Tea: The Earl's Garden (currently out of stock)
Source: David's tea, bought in the summer
Type: Black, with marigold petals, strawberries, cornflower petals; strawberry and bergamot flavouring
Remarks: I love Earl Grey, so this was going to be a slam-dunk. It smelled heavenly! And it tasted lush! And it made my heartburn flare up, so I think when I drink this again - and I will - I'll brew it a minute or two less and see if that helps with the tannins.

I've been enjoying this foray into new and interesting teas, and I'm going to spend a bit of time sorting out which ones I'll try next.

See you in a few days!

Now Is The Summer Of Our Disorganization

Oh, have I fallen off the organization wagon.

This summer has been a combination of work, teaching, and trying to relax in the down time, along with spurts of madly tidying the living room, dining room and kitchen and scrubbing the bathroom before friends arrive to visit.

While I love having my family home during the summer, I have to admit that I'm really, REALLY ready for everyone to go back to school and for our home to slip back into a routine. My laundry day got completely derailed, and I'd like to not have to scramble to put a load of wash on so that I have underwear. Sorry if that's TMI, but that's reality at Geek Central.

I have taken the last two weeks off of work so that I could actually, legitimately relax, and while we took four days to travel 6 hours away to visit friends, and I did relax and enjoy that, I feel a bit at loose ends now that we're home. I want to get stuff done! I just want to kick everyone out for a day and get a bunch of stuff done, because painting the bathroom when five other people want to use it is not fun. I have a lovely, huge spice rack that was custom built for me, and that I painted, and it's just propped up against the kitchen wall where it's to be mounted because of stupid things like actually getting to the store for the drywall anchors and making the countersink pilot holes. I have the paint upstairs, waiting to put the second coat on the dining room and living room, but I can't move the bookshelf by myself. I really want to get the painting done, so that we can start enjoying life in our dream house the way we want it to look.

Oh yes, I had mentioned teaching. Have I told you about that?

I was asked to be an instructor at our local cultural centre for their kids' art camps, so I taught cross stitch for two weeks, blackwork embroidery for a week, and knitting for a week. Average class size was 5 students, except for the knitting class, which had TWELVE kids in it! The first three classes were really relaxed and enjoyable, but that week of knitting was a challenge!From students having crying jags in frustration, to students not bothering to try because they didn't do it perfectly the first time, to giving up on teaching them how to cast on, it really tested me as an instructor. But by the end of the week, most of the kids had a significant chunk of knitting completed to show their parents, and at least one of them had already gone out and bought knitting supplies to do more at home.  If even one child picks it up as a hobby, I consider it a resounding success :)

The day after the last class, we took off to visit our friends, and arrived home a week ago. There was a whole mess of birthday gatherings in the last week, as we celebrated my 45th birthday, as well as my in-laws' 45th anniversary, and my father-in-law's *mumblemumble*th birthday.

But enough about my summer of (relative) sloth; Hubby is ready to go get those drywall anchors, so it's back to work for me!

My Journey of Hope: Craft Room Conversion!

Hubby said the sexiest thing to me this past Saturday. He took my hand as I was about to head out of our bedroom, smiled at me and said, "How about on Sunday, we stay home from church, and..."

My Journey of Hope: The Room of DOOM - Before and After

That's right, you heard me.

Doom.

DOOM!

Tertius and Quarta's room has been the bane of my existence since they could pull thing off of the shelves (which coincidentally, preceded walking by a few months). It's messy, it's overcrowded. and it's not being used to its fullest potential in any way, shape, or form. It was less-than-helpful that our cat, Saffron, viewed Quarta as her main competition, and decided to exert her dominance by urinating on Quarta's clothes and belongings, stinking up the joint like nobody's business!

Hubby and I have been systematically chipping away at the mess; reminders throughout the day to "pick up 20 things" are met alternately with excitement, or with eye rolls and groans, but they've been making headway. Very, very slow headway. And as often as not, for all the progress they made, they'd reward themselves by pulling out half again as many toys to play with. So, I was just sick of it; the mess, the smell, the constant roller coaster ride of cleanliness,  and I needed to step in. The end result is that I spent the better part of 5 or 6 hours in there over the last two days, trying to not only tame the overwhelming mess, but also to find the source of the cat urine problem.

This was taken about two hours into cleaning, so it already looks miles better than before

This is what I found when I pulled out the rolling cart that Tertius stores some of his toys in

Quarta's dresser is to the left, with her rolling cart toy storage; the dresser in the center has extra sheets, and costumes stashed away.

In the process of cleaning, I located three sources of the urine stench - in front of Tertius' dresser, under the bunk beds, and in the closet. The room reeked, and I don't know how they could stand the smell. And there I was, without baking soda to neutralize the odour! That red bag you see in the photo above? That's most of the garbage I pulled out of their room. Not just garbage, but anything that had been peed on and was not salvageable.  I soaked an untold number of Lego pieces and Hot Wheels cars to get rid of the stench overnight. Given the number of Pokemon cards I had to toss, I think the kids both learned a valuable lesson.

I had each child help me individually, which I feel worked very well, and together, we got everything off the floor, and even from under the bed. We left it last night like this:

Hey, there's a carpet under there!

you can't see the cat urine, but it's there... but at least the mess isn't!

SOO much better!

The next step is finishing up the closet, then taking the Bissel Little Green Machine to the carpet and try to get rid of the smell.

I'll keep you posted!

My Journey of Hope: Getting Buy-In

This weekend has been all about buy-in for me.

First up, my parents. They are both dealing with myriad health issues, and the biggest thing they're facing right now is my father's newly discovered kidney disease. It is causing a great deal of fatigue for him, to the point that walking from the living room to the bathroom makes him winded. And forget about stairs! So, adjustments have been made in the house to accommodate their current needs, but their food storage was still an issue, as was making healthy meals. They have been relying more heavily on canned and packaged foods of late, which isn't as good as whole foods, but with limited ability to access the freezer in the basement, that complicated things.

My brother, sis-in-law and nephew were visiting this weekend, so we took the opportunity to bring a luncheon feast to them all. We even invited BioDad's father over, because after all, he's family. I made a rather spectacular creamy baked potato soup, and we had salads, chips and deli buns to enjoy. Mumsy went out to the store and picked up dessert, too!

While there, Bro, Hubby, and I had a chance to talk about some solutions for the food issue, and we presented the following idea: they have two ancient freezers (no really; one is something like 50 years old) in the basement, both full to the brim with food of unknown age and condition. Bro and I have volunteered to go through both of them, tossing anything outdated or freezer-burnt, and condensing what's left. We then suggested that they look at buying a new upright freezer that lives on the main floor, and we would batch-cook things like spaghetti sauce, chili, meat loaf, lasagna, etc. and freeze them in two portions. Then all they have to do is get a freezer bag or foil loaf pan out the night before, and cook up the side dishes while it cooks.

Thankfully, both of our parents were really on board with the idea! Of course, the moment I mentioned putting the old freezers out to pasture, he got this slightly panicked look on his face - we can't get rid of something useful, right? Baby steps - we'll start with de-cluttering the freezers, and see where it leads, but he did admit that neither appliance is very energy-conscious and would likely lower their power bill to have them shut off. It's so heartening to see progress being made.

Sunday saw me without a vehicle, so I was unable to attend church, though Primus got a ride from Hubby before he left for the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism) event going on this weekend. (Side story: when Primus arrived at church, the man leading the worship team was disappointed that P was not on the platform, guitar in hand. He had jammed with them at the Thursday practice and got great response, and I think they all kind of expected that he would be playing. He had to let them know that he was in charge of media today, but nonetheless, they gave him copies of the music, complete with guitar chords, that he can now practice at home. What a great boost to his self-esteem! I'm so stinkin' proud of that kid.)

Because we were stuck at home, I decided to declare it Pajama Day, and Tertius, Quarta and I stayed in our jammie-jams all day long - you should have seen the confusion when Hubby and I told them to get their jammies on for bed tonight! We watched Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban, followed by a show that Secunda requested, "Attacking the Devil: Harold Evans and the Last Nazi War Crime", a documentary on Thalidomide babies, and the newspaper campaign of truth that blew the story open in the 1970s. Fascinating show. The little guys had some questions, so we talked about the birth defects, the improper testing, and the shoddy compensation offered to families. It also gave me the opportunity to talk to them about how such birth defects rarely affect cognitive ability, how these men and women overcame the limitations this medication placed upon them, and how they are able to function quite well in the world.

When we took a break for them to practice their breakdance routine that they're doing for the talent show at school, I went downstairs to the office, which had begun to get cluttered again. I spent a few minutes assessing what I can do (starting with putting a few items up on the 24 hour bidding site), and by the time Tertius and Quarta came inside, I had a bag at the ready. We quickly picked up about 20 pieces of garbage, and made it look much nicer in there! I had no whining, no cajoling, and no resistance to the task as presented to them. It put such a smile on my face!

So, not a lot of work got done around here because of my painful hands, but dishes got completely caught up again, progress was made in the office, and a big step has started for my parents' home.

Talk about a weekend of win!

My Journey of Hope: The De-Cluttering Continues!

I was at the dollar store with Secunda today, picking up flower pots for a fairy garden workshop we were doing later in the evening. While there, I had the lovely idea of finding a method of better organizing the bathroom drawer that Tertius and Quarta share. Up until now, the only measure I'd taken to tame the chaos in the drawer was to put a narrow plastic tray in there to contain the toothbrushes and toothpaste, which had become woefully inadequate. It seemed that the toothbrushes were breeding (another area that my children hoard items), the most recent trip to the dentist had yielded two new mini-tubes of paste, and the whole drawer was well past due for an overhaul.

My Journey of Hope: Day 28 of 28 - Creating (and keeping!) An Oasis Of Calm, Part Two

Okay, you've been very patient with me, so here are the photos of the front deck at this stage of completeness. I just need to update my chair, the table, and the carpet, and perhaps add some lighting. Then it will be perfect for us!

My own little flower planter! Pansies and verbena

Secunda's birthday cineraria (round pot), and Secunda's' planter full of pansies, heliotrope and verbena

My tea roses from the hobbitses' school (round pot), and Tertius' planter of pansies, heliotrope and nemesia

Our wee strawberry patch!

Enjoying breakfast on a sunny day! Our herbs are planted in the green pots hanging from the railing: lemon balm, winter savoury, cilantro, basil and oregano

My Journey of Hope: Decluttering - It's the Little Things That Count

After dropping Hubby and the hobbitses off at their respective schools, I came home to make breakfast, grab an iced coffee, and head out to run errands. And while in the kitchen, I decided to take of my Lazy Vision™ goggles, and really look at my kitchen.

And when I looked at the point of entry, this is what I saw:

My Journey of Hope: Day 28 of 28 - Reflections

Well, here we are at the end of the 28 day journey, and while, admittedly, my surgery really derailed things at the end, I am still very pleased with the progress that has been made in my home, and how clean and de-cluttered the areas I've worked on are staying. This house is FAR from done, but I feel that my efforts were worth it, and it's worth it to keep at it, a little bit at a time.

I also think it's worth the time to address what worked, what didn't work, and what I'd like to try with my next phase of this.

What Worked:

1. Looking around and finding something that bugged me enough to change it was the single most motivating factor on this whole thing.

2. Getting buy-in from family members ahead of time. The big, shameful mess in front of our living room bookshelves had a lot of things that didn't belong to me, so I knew that I had to have Hubby on board with addressing his share of it beforehand, and he agreed to deal with his things. Now, his stuff still isn't put away into their proper places, but that's mostly because we just don't have those places yet. Yes, they now reside in the previously cleared part of the office, but they were not shoved back in behind the chairs, and that is progress. I am calling this a win.

3. Pre-writing portions of blog posts. Life gets very hectic very easily, and I found that the best way to stay on top of the blogging was to pre-select topics to write on, put a blurb in, and save them as drafts. The point-form notes reminded me of what I wanted to say, and I was better able to more faithfully blog about the process that way. I allowed life to carry me away, and I was not nearly as good about blogging my progress, so there are things that got done that will not be blogged about, but the important thing is, I can see that they got done, and my home looks better for it.

4. Awareness and mindfulness of our stuff, where it is, and where we leave it has increased dramatically. Both Hubby and I are being more intentional about our belongings and where they live.

What Didn't Work:

1. Getting anything done in Tertius and Quarta's room. I knew that was my biggest obstacle going into this, but I still had hope that they would come on board. And Tertius was pretty enthusiastic at the start. But when he realized that some actual work had to get done, his enthusiasm fizzled out very quickly. They would be asked to pick up in their room, but within minutes, they could be found either re-creating the mess they had just cleaned, or making an even bigger one. I think that this room is a week-long task unto itself, and one that I will have to undertake while they're at school.

2. Pre-selecting areas to work on. It's lovely to make a neat, tidy little list of places that need de-cluttering, but it's another thing entirely to actually work that list.

What I'd Do Differently:

1. More buy-in from family members. I think in order to not be fighting upstream, I need my family to not only buy into me de-cluttering, but I need them to opt in as well.

2. Work for a set time, and make that in the mornings. I'm finding that I am more effective if I just jump right into a task after dropping everyone off at school.

For those of you who jumped onto this crazy train with me, what are your reflections?

My Journey of Hope: Day 23 of 28 - Wherein Everything Comes To A Screeching Halt

I knew when I started this journey that things might have to take a break. I had minor surgery scheduled for April 26th, and as I expected, the recovery is taking a lot out of me. I'm pretty tired, and pretty achy. Th e day of the actual surgery, it ate up most of the day, and I had a 2 hour nap in the afternoon. The meds the hospital gave me were still working pretty well, so I was able to socialize when a friend dropped by, and we had a lovely supper together.

I woke this morning , my stomach a bloated, achy mess. I spent the bulk of the day on the couch, binge-watching Firefly, and plotting cross stitch patterns - first up is a little stitchy of Wash on cloudy sky linen. I did wash a rack of hand dishes, and got the rest of the dishes organized for Primus and Secunda. And then I had to rest. I made myself a sandwich for lunch, and then I had to rest again. I feel like a wimp, but I know that overdoing it now will mean I pay for it for days. So I take it easy.

All this said, I will be back at it tomorrow, working on a small job, and hoping to keep the momentum up for this last push.

Thanks for coming along for the ride!

Keep On Keepin' On

I've been finding that this whole journey is having new and seemingly lasting benefits. Despite slow days, setbacks and times when I just don't feel like doing a thing around my home, I am noticing that the tendency to do little pockets of de-cluttering have really settled in as a new habit.  This daily striving to have a better home, this persistent de-cluttering, chipping away at the years of stuff - it is becoming an ingrained habit for me to look at an object, analyze it, and make a decisive choice about its worthiness to stay in my life and home. I like this new habit.

For those of you joining in on this journey, are you noticing any positive side-effects? Feel free to share!

My Journey of Hope: Day 18 of 28 - The Day Nothing Got Done

I seriously got nothing done today. Not at home.

I spent the first 15 minutes of the school day reading aloud with Quarta's Kindergarten class, touched base with Tertius briefly (who had spent much of the morning trying to convince me of how sick he was), and attended Secunda's Entrepreneur Fair, wherein she sold every last monster journal and monster pencil she had made, plus a handful of woven bracelets, PLUS 9 orders for more items!


I found out at the last minute that I wasn't working today, so thought that I had a little wiggle room in my schedule. In reality, there was enough time to run home, scramble to find the ball of yarn Secunda needed so I could deliver it before lunch, only to have my search interrupted by the school secretary calling to inform me that Tertius just wasn't going to make it through the day after all, and could I please come and pick him up? Okay; race to school with the wrong yarn, pick up the sickie - who seemed very bright and perky for someone who "just couldn't make it through the day" - race home, make lunch, and race to church to prep for my community outreach gig. I've brought Quarta with me before she was in Kindy, but Tertius had never been before, and was a hit with the other ladies present. I worked until the last minute, knowing that I'd likely have to store the supplies at home until Sunday, and race back to the school via the church, only to find a car in the parking lot, so I raced to get the stuff inside and put away properly. Continued my frantic trip to the school to pick up the girls, started the paper route, picked Primus up, followed by Hubby, then home to drop off backpacks, have Primus and Secunda pack for their weekend with BD, then finish up the paper route.

So, while the day was ridiculously busy, not a single bit of de-cluttering got done

Such is life sometimes.

My Journey of Hope: Day 14 of 28 - Before and After

Here is one of the shameful corners of my house. The really silly thing is, it's not even hidden from anyone. It's out in plain sight, but my Lazy Vision sees right past it, multiple times a day. And if I can't see it, it doesn't exist, right?

But today I am faced with an uncomfortable reality. EVERYONE can see it, and it's the first thing people see upon entering my living room. And it's gross. It makes us look like hoarders, or at the very least, crappy housekeepers. We love doing crafts, and sometimes need to pull a lot of items out to do them, but we're really bad about putting it away again. I mean REALLY bad.

My Journey of Hope: Day 14 Retrospective

Hello, friends!

Well, here we are, at the halfway point of my 28 day journey, and I think it's time for some reflection on the first half of things.

The Good:

- I am noticing improvement every time I de-clutter
- I am feeling happier with my home
- I am feeling less stress
- Most members of my family have done one de-cluttering session
- I look to time spent de-cluttering as time spent on me
- I now have the number of a repair man to see to the washing machine (UPDAY: even called and left a message!)
- I like having before, during, and after photos, to show me my progress
- If I have a plan by the morning, I am much more likely to get it done
- I am doing far more on-the-fly de-cluttering; one item here and there throughout the day begins to add up, and I can see that it is becoming easier for me to do it without thinking (or taking photos of it!)

The Bad:

- My family is largely not on board with this; nobody else is de-cluttering with any regularity. This makes the process difficult, as I can't/am not allowed to cull anyone else's stuff
- Being the only one actively doing this, it is very easy to fall into a state of sloth.
- Regular tasks, such as folding laundry aren't getting done. I think this is because I've chosen to de-clutter, and others aren't helping with laundry, which they would normally do
- Having a broken dishwasher and washing machine has  been an enormous obstacle, as I never feel like I'm making headway in the house, but rather, struggling to just catch up
- It is report card time, which means that Hubby is less interested/inclined/motivated to help de-clutter his own stuff
- I am less inclined to de-clutter on rainy days
- a lack of a plan for the day often results in no de-cluttering
- unless I do a significant amount of de-cluttering, I feel that it's not enough to bother taking a photo of

The Ugly:

- I am noticing new things being deposited in the areas I have de-cluttered, and not always by me
- The kids' daily chores aren't being done, compounding the feeling of not being able to just catch up
- I am still struggling to shed my feelings of frustration and resentment about the lack of support and buy-in from my family
- having a sick family member saps my desire to de-clutter

So, from this list, I see that my mental game still has a long way to go. I can knuckle down and just get it done (or at least, as much as I can do without opposition from a family member), but the mindset is taking longer to adjust.

I'm not giving up, though, because I'm worth it, and so is my home.

My Journey to Hope: The Chip On My Shoulder

Thanks to the world of clip art, I have a picture of me that I'd like to share.

Me, if I were a brunette man in a business suit

Yep, that's me all over. There I am, carrying the weight of my home on my shoulders, feeling like I'm doing it all by myself. And to a large extent, I am. I'm the one who works very part-time out of the home, so I'm the one who can be here to maintain the home. I understand and accept that the bulk of the housework falls to me. Well, I'm working on it. Okay, sometimes, I'm downright resentful that the entire family leaves their stuff laying around, because it communicates an assumption that I'll clean it all up for them.

For several years now, I've tried very hard to follow FlyLady's approach to housework: that we need to let go of any resentment, bitterness and anger at our family's unwillingness to clean up after themselves, and to lovingly and joyfully do everything without any expectation that they will lift a finger to do any of it. I tried. I did. And this was the one thing I Just. Couldn't. Get. Over.

My Journey of Hope: Day 8 of 28 - Before and After

Thank you, dear readers, for coming along on this journey with me! I hope you've enjoyed reading some of my reflections on this process, and to thank you, here is my latest "Before & After"!

Today's cluttered area was around the master bedroom door:

To be fair, the baby gate just showed up there today,
as we had a guest and her toddler visiting. But I haven't used my
longbow (on the left) in years. YEARS.

I knew that a great deal of it was mine, from the aforementioned longbow, to the bins of photographs for scrapbooking. But a respectable amount was also just garbage, and the same again was stuff that only Hubby could make decisions about, so guess what he has ahead of him? And to be fair, he asked me to de-clutter this particular spot, so this really is for him.

Down to a box of felt for crafts, and a bunch of paperwork for Hubby to wade through

This photo was taken about 5 minutes into the job. Really, sweeping the dust bunnies took about as long as going through my own papers!

Ahhhhh...

While there are still three things hanging around outside my bedroom, it's more manageable, cleaner, and more likely to reduce my feelings of stress. And it all got done in about 20 minutes, while listening to a TV show. See? Easy!!!

My Journey of Hope: Lazy Vision

No, that's not a typo.

I bet the first thing that popped into your head was something like this:

Image from Young Justice

But you'd be wrong. So, so wrong.

My Journey of Hope: In Praise of Mirepoix

A couple of years ago, my beloved friend Panda said to me one day, "Do you want to have a day where we make mirepoix?"

Now, you may be asking yourself what exactly mirepoix is. I certainly did! Basically, it's a bunch of finely chopped vegetables.

The standard seems to be 2 cups onion, and 1 cup each carrot
 and celery, but we find 1:1:1 ratio fits best into the bags

My Journey of Hope: Day 6 of 28 - Back to Common Drudgery

Day 6 was kind of a bust, with a few bright spots.

I didn't tackle a specific de-cluttering job, but I found myself doing small amounts of de-cluttering as I went through each room, nonetheless. So, no real progress to show for my efforts, but a cumulative improvement overall. I did, however, make up a list of spaces in the house that I'd like to de-clutter, even sorting them into small, medium, and large jobs. I think I've got at least 20 things on it (and there's probably at least 20 more I haven't even thought of yet!), so I have a good idea of what to do for the rest of my 28 day focus. I did wash some hand dishes, so while it's technically a daily task and not de-cluttering per se, it did serve to clear my kitchen counter some.

Church was good; our friend A was preaching, which is always a positive experience, and his two most recent sermons have been convicting and made me really stop and think about who I am, not just to God, but to me, and how my words and actions appear to those around me. Striving to be better every day.